(no subject)

[austin_tycho]

Sunday Five

1. Using one adjective, describe your current living space.
spacious
2. Using two adjectives, describe your current employer.
(I'll assume the organization rather than my boss) reliable, bureaucratic
3. Using three adjectives, describe your favorite hobby/pasttime.
private, ecstatic, sticky
4. Using four adjectives, describe your typical day.
organized, slack-filled, communicative, musical
5. Using five adjectives, describe your ideal life.
enlightening, hedonistic, stimulating, relaxing, contradictory :)

And from this dating guide, my commentary (per austingoddess):

Scorpio Dating Guide
Here are some things you can do with Scorpio to ensure a successful date. Go to the theater [I prefer movies, buy okay], play a game [Pictionary- yes, computer games- nyet], take a cruise (short or long) [for a date? Alright!], go to a suspense movie [what, with the guys on hooks? Ew!], play paint-ball [uh, no], go swimming [yeah!], go to the museum [sure!], go hot-tubbing [definitely], attend a sporting event [ewwww! no no no no!], do some late-night star watching [absotutely], go to a carnival or fair together [eh, okay], go to an improv night together [yeah] and participate [NOOOOO!], go sailing together [I don't know how to sail, but I'd give it a shot], spend an evening star-watching [followed by late-night star watching?], go ice-skating [yeah, okay], go to a costume party [er, I don't think so]
You & Your Scorpio
Do's
Look as scrumptious as possible whenever you're in your Scorpio's presence [Huh? I'd be happy with 'fairly clean']. They will appreciate natural sex appeal -- or what appears to be natural [what a load. If I like natural (which I do) this flies in the face of 'look scrumptious as possible' which implies a lot of primping and 'product' as the poofters on Queer Eye say]. Get ready and willing to talk in great detail about your fantasies and your dirty little secrets. Share all: Your Scorpio will want to know all your hidden desires and will probably want to fulfill them [I tend not to disagree]. Invest in some satin sheets and scented candles [no, satin these days means a dead dinosaur product. If you're gonna go fancy with the sheets, go with silk. And scented candles only if the scent is made from natural products, not what a lab comes up with that smells like "vanilla" or "ocean breeze" or some similar horror] . Your Scorpio will provide the seduction music and the massage [that's not unlikely]. Become comfortable with the feeling that you're being devoured head to toe by the intense Scorpionic gaze. When your Scorpio stares into your eyes, they won't have to say a word for you to know what's on their mind. Let go: You will enter into a deeper, more intense relationship than you might have imagined possible. Your Scorpio will be the most passionate, magnetic all-consuming partner you have ever known. [I'll have to defer to the judges on some of this stuff]
Don'ts
Never accuse a Scorpio of being faithless or toying with your emotions. They will take it as a serious insult [this is probably true]. Scorpio is one of the most faithful and devoted Signs. Don't even think about arousing a Scorpio's jealousy, either intentionally or thoughtlessly . Your Scorpio could lash out violently, becoming angry or overly possessive [yeah, I'm bad this way]. Avoid teasing a Scorpio about their performance in bed [shit- I don't think you should tease anyone about their performance in the sack. It's rude!]. Scorpions are renowned for their sexual prowess, and they usually are quite proud of their reputation. Forget launching your own emotional fireworks or dramatic displays without considering the consequences [again, I should think this goes for anyone]. Your Scorpio may counteract with an intensity that you're not willing or able to match [I tend to avoid being dramatic, but I can get intense].

This was somewhat accurate, but the one for Sag missed hub on almost all marks. He's such a non-Sag, that I think the doctor must have misread the calendar. He's a lot more like a Scorpio in a lot of ways, actually.